The Perfect Gift: A Memory Box for Your Loved One with Dementia

We often hear from families who are seeking better ways of connecting with their loved ones with dementia. And, just as often, a family caregiver will share with us that exciting moment when, presented with an old photo, mom or dad perked up and proceeded to recall with great detail the individuals in the photo and the situation in which it was taken.

Of course, moments like these are precious for everyone. But figuring out what item might spark a memory isn’t easy. The truth is that everyone is unique, with their own individual life story full of memories. And as for which single item might stir a memory … no one can know for certain.

What is a memory box? What should go into it?

A memory box is a great way for families to gather together special mementos from days past and keep them in a place where they can be enjoyed regularly. It is exactly what it sounds like, a box full of memories. And they can include all kinds of things:

• Photographs
• Pictures, artwork, drawings made by loved ones
• Postcards
• Newspaper clippings
• Small personal items with meaning, such as an old coin case or wallet
• Jewelry, money clip, belt buckles
• Any other mementos that aren’t overly bulky and can fit in a box.

Some families create virtual memory boxes by storing photos, music, videos and audio tapes online. The objective is always the same, to keep precious mementos together in a safe, but accessible place where other family members can contribute to them along the way.

For individuals with dementia, these memory boxes are powerful in their ability to connect them with their past as well as connect to those around them. Sorting through the various mementos together brings a unique opportunity for families with loved ones who have a dementia because, while it impairs cognition and short term memory, it often leaves long term memories intact  

Memory boxes can also be used for other purposes including:

• Sharing with family and close friends.
• Providing background to the loved one’s senior care living community.
• Connecting younger generations in the family to the loved one’s life.

It isn’t hard to get started making a memory box for your loved one. Chances are you probably have a good portion of items readily available. Then it’s just a matter of finding a sturdy box that is large enough to hold the mementos but not too heavy. Many craft stores sell wooden or heavy cardboard storage boxes at reasonable prices.

If you’d like to put a memory box together for your loved one, here are some tips:

• Try to include written descriptions of the major milestones in your loved one’s life. Short notes and recollections can later be read aloud to your loved one.
• Be sure to write captions on your photos and include the names of those in the photo, along with dates.
• It doesn’t have to be a box. For instance, you can use a large jar to hold smaller photos and memorabilia. Smaller jars can be placed in areas around the home for quick access.
• Given the popularity of making short videos, you might have a family member record a short interview with your loved one and get them talking about the old days. You can play them back for them and other family members and friends.

Remember, there are no hard fast rules to building memory boxes. And you can certainly make more than one and keep them in convenient places for easy access. Then, when you find yourself sitting with mom on a rainy day, you now have a fun activity to enjoy. “Mom, let’s take a look at our memory box. I added a few items.”  

Memory boxes may be full of old mementos, but the delight of engaging with them never grows old. The conversations surrounding a visit to the memory box will always be fresh and alive. Not only will your memory box benefit your loved one with dementia, but everyone in the family will soon discover the value of the special connections it brings.  

Need some more tips? Feel free to reach out to any of our Anthem Memory Care communities. Many of our residents and staff members have created memory boxes. We’ll be glad to share some ideas to get you started.